Sunday, June 27, 2010

Good weekends...

Good weekends are the perfect breeding ground for lessons learned. But when a lesson is offered to you its kinda like contracting an STD... it can be avoided with a small amount of care and attention. I may have been a little careless this weekend in that sense. I learned a couple useful things I'd like to share.

Some friends of ours, we call them the M.P.'s because those are both their initials and the guy earned the nickname early in life due to his impossible to pronounce last name, came over and we had supper, played cars, and may have consumed an alcoholic beverage or 7... or was it 10? As you will learn I am some times talented... counting while intoxicated is not one of those times. Neither is remembering my date of birth... which can get you arrested, but that's a story long in the past that I'll have to attempt to explain later.

Here are a few lessons that have been offered to me this weekend...

1. A vegetable steaming device would be the first thing I reached for to defend myself if a knife were not handy. Because of the overwhelming amount of yellow and green squash our garden is producing its something I cook at every meal, which means I've had to start getting creative with it. I have this cool little, metal thing that has holds and folds up that nobody ever knows what the heck it is. I do remember once when I was a kid my mom using one to steam vegetables, therefore I do know what it is. You unfold it, put it in the bottom of a pot with a small amount of water, put your veggies on top of it, put the lid on, and turn the burner on for a while. As I was putting my vegetables down in the put trying to mix them up some to make sure my seasoning was evenly distributed I managed to make a 2 inch long, extremely deep gash in my finger on the edge of this handy vegetable steaming device. I don't do well with blood so you can imagine my dismay at the fact that I was pouring blood from my hand all over the kitchen! Chad's solution? he wrapped a paper towel around it, a latex glove around that, and finished off with half a roll of clear tape.... which leads to another lesson I've been presented and will probably accept, I am not the kind of person that needs to run out of band aids. So I'm going to the dollar general down the road to get some here shortly.

2. Ice cubes don't belong in shot glasses. After a margarita and a few mixed drinks I got the bright idea that my poker playing would improve significantly if I took a few shots of a few types of liquor. I invited my friend to join in on the shots. She opted for some so co, which was the only thing that hadn't been in the fridge. I decided I'd help her out with my fantastic idea. I grabbed an ice cube from the freezer and attempted to hold it in the liquor to chill it but not drop it in... apparently dextarity is something you lose after the amount of alcohol I had consumed. I dropped the ice cube in the shot glass (for those who don't drink much, your standard ice cube tray ice cube is about the same size as the liquid holding portion of the shot glass) spilling so co all over my bar, cook books, floor, etc...I spun around and grabbed the first thing I saw resembling a towel. which leads to my next lesson opportunity...

3. I don't have skill. You know on the movies when the super skilled person grabs the table cloth and rips it off the table without disturbing the dishes on the table top... those people are ranked among the gods apparently. The towel I reached for to clean up my spill was under 2 of my fancy glasses we drank from at supper. Needless to say I had fewer dishes to wash after I attempted my little trick.

4. Because of the amount of broken glass on my kitchen floor I was offered another lesson. Sweeping is not something drunks should attempt if possible. I picked about 3 pieces of glass out of my foot this morning. Fun stuff.

5. When you wake up in the morning and your eyes are still swimming in their sockets, roll over and go back to sleep. Do not get up, get in your car, and drive to town to feed your teacher's dogs that you promised you'd feed while their outta town. Apparently when things fly by you at a speed of appx. 65mph it induces last nights fun to revist you for an after party.

So yes, I've had a possibly educational weekend. We'll see how many of these lessons I absorb.

No comments:

Post a Comment