Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Its a fact of life.

Its a fact of life that the grass is always "greener" on the other side. Everyone is always unhappy with what they have and they want what everyone else has.

Its a fact of life that boys are jerks. Them and their "damn boy penises" (cursing is allowed when quoting, especially when quoting grey's.)

Its a fact of life that there will never be enough money for bills or groceries but there will always be enough money to go rope.

Its a fact of life that I never fall for boys, I only fall for their families.

Its a fact of life that myself and people my age will have to work from the grave to finish paying off all our debt.

Its a fact of life that nothing will ever go as planned.

Its a fact of life that even if I made $100,000 a year instead of $9,754 a year I would still be broke... I would just work more. So please tell me, what's the point?

Its a fact of life that we hold other people to higher standards than what we hold ourselves to...

Its a fact of life that kids these days are spoiled rotten. They need a good strong beating out behind the barn.

Its a fact of life that all the great guys in the world are taken by the girls that are the reason for pools being chlorinated.

Its a fact of life that if you live in mena, ar you shouldn't have relations with the locals... STDs run a muck in polk county.

On that note, its a fact of life that when a girl is dating a gyn's son and gets an STD that the world is entitled to "rofl".

Its a fact of life that trig is the most ridiculous class ever required for any degree... as my teacher so graciously pointed out, you may need it if you ever become a nuclear engineer. Yeah, that's why I'm an ag science major.

Working is a fact of life.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Emily's Last hoorah!

It began last thursday. I woke up late and already knew the day was going to be one of THOSE days as I knew there was a trig test to be taken shortly after my 5ft vertical jump from my bed when I realized I'd over slept by about an hour. Made it to class at exactly 9:46. Late. Awesome.... 15+hours of homework/prep for the trig test + 2 hours spent trying to tell myself to breath + the teacher calling time before I'm done = hello begining to my awful weekend. After class the boy took me to Flying Burger for lunch. My salad sucked unlike last time which irked me. Then I had to go to work. I arrived at work to realize my phone was not on my person. I flew back across campus to Flying Burger to see if by some chance it was there... Nope. Went back to the business building to the classroom where my nightmares are fullfilled, not there either. Proceeded to clean out my car, not there. That covers everywhere I had been since I left home and I still hadn't found my phone. Crap. So I went back to work and did nothing. Went home to change to go watch Pilgrims Farms cut silage, we got there too late and missed it. Went to eat at West Shore. Ordered a steak and a margarita. Slurped down the first margarita long before my food came and got started on the next. My food came and my steak was rare not medium. GAG! Sent it back and ate my baked potato while gulping my margarita thinking surely the tequilla would kick in and save my day. Wrong. 20 minutes late my steak was not back to the table. I told the waitress just to charge me for my tater and drinks and we'd call it even. She apologizes and brings me my steak in a to go box with fries and informs me my entire tab has been cleared. Ok... cool. Free meal. That works. Get home and get completely chewed out for not being home by 7:30 as I had GUESSED we would be. I was not driving and last time I checked I didn't have a curfew. Guess I was wrong again. Climb into bed to hide from the rest of the day and wake up friday with a mile long list of things to do so we can leave for mena. I decided to heat up my free steak for lunch. Get it out of the box and turns out they still didn't send me a medium steak, they sent me a charcoaled black steak with a still pretty rare center. Seriously?Gah! The boy of course complains about the steak being burnt. What's new? Finally get everything loaded and ready and head to polk county with no way to contact the outside world when I get there. Oh joy. On the bright side of that I got my hair did by Betsy friday night and it turned out AWESOME!
Saturday me and Trav were supposed to go swimming. He ditched me for his friends, who can blame him? I don't really. He promised we'd hang out sunday because he's leaving this week to go back to tulsa. No big deal, works for me. Took Braxton to the boy's house to ride horses and swim. It was 102 degrees so we didn't go swimming, we waited for it to cool off so we could go ride. Went to saddle the horses and they were turned out. Screw that idea. So we took Braxton for a ride on the "bike" (aka four wheeler). He was plenty content with riding it over to see the horses and pet them. Went to look at the new stud... lovin me some Mr. Jess Perry. Let Braxton sit on Jody while we led him around. he was pretty impressed. Then we went to eat with Jason and Sarah. That was fun. Their new addition is just really cute! Brought Braxton to meet my grandparents, that was the first time he ever screamed about going somewhere with nanny and papa. It made me feel awful. so I promise him I'll see him in the morning and send him off screaming and climb in the car with myself in tears. We head out to the bar with some friends. The night starts off decently, double fisting long necks. And it all went down hill from there. Afte r the first 6 or maybe 8 beers and a shot of vodka we got this "bright" idea. Lets drink one of everything they have in the cooler... Great idea girls. What were we thinking? After that the boy drags me out of the bar and to the car where I proceed to be overly obnoxious. I can't remember why buy I smacked my friend's husband in the eye pretty good. He was impressed. Made it home about 3 a.m. where I proceeded to throw up for about 45 minutes straight. I think that's a record for me. Climbed into bed and thought I'd wake up just fine in the morning. Wrong again. Woke up about 9 hoping someone would hurry and put me out of my misery. No such luck. I proceeded to throw up and convulse until 4p.m. I then took a shower and drove out to my grandparents to see Braxton still not feeling up to anything. Told my mom why I didn't show up earlier in the day. She informed me that I'm "really f***ing stupid and deserve to feel that bad"... thanks mom. Trav then concurs and I wonder why I even bothered to make the hour long round trip. Loaded my stuff up and left about 6 to drive back to magnolia. Got to the boy's house where his dad proceeded to inform me that he also agreed with my mom. If anyone thinks that I hadn't already come to the same conclusion they are wrong and them saying it out loud only makes my head hurt worse. Made it back to magnolia about 10:30 with an awesome headache. Climbed into bed and hoped to never wake. Needless to say I've decided that saturday night will likely be my last hoorah. I can't feel that way ever again... I would surely pay someone to end it.
Woke up late again this morning and headed to trig to see my test score from thursday. Yep, that's what I figured. Made myself a 35%. I'm so proud I got 4 right! Left class and went to work which is always miserable. Came home and when the boy got home he proceeded to give me permission to cook supper before I go to town to work on my trig with a study group. I didn't move. He came back and asked when I was going to start cooking. I said "I'm not". He chewed me out. Guess what I made for supper. I didn't.... boys are jerks. Got all but 2 questions done on my trig project... proofs are the devil.
Now here I am... collecting phone numbers for my new phone. Which by the way... is pretty awesome!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

My weekend + 2 days

Seeing as how I went to mena this weekend, I was all full of "piss and viniger" when we got back to magnolia. Someone always manages to step on my toes when I enter polk county. Anyway... friday when we arrived in polk county we were scheduled to meet with Chad's best friend from New York that I hadn't ever met before. When we pulled up in the friend's parent's driveway I could have had a stroke... I am still not sure I didn't... anyway. Its a small world out there, especially in polk county. It turns out that Rodney's parents were the best friends of the late parents of a very serious mishap on my track record. I made a large mistake once upon a time... it involved that dirty little 8 letter word that starts with "M" and has got the world going all kinds of crazy. Anyway... I did eventually feel my way out of the disaster that was just upon the horizon, so please don't hold it against me that I almost got swept up in that fad. Enough about that... it was an awkward couple of minutes that THANKFULLY ended before there were any "cusses or discusses" thrown into the air. Pretty uneventful, yet entertaining eveing. We went to eat, of course we took the NY couple to wal mart... you don't visit mena without going to wal mart, then drove up on the mountain although you can't see anything at night, then we drove back roads for a while. We eventually made it back to Rodney's parent's house to drop him and his wife off. Somehow we made it up the driveway, I don't know how seeing as how "cold" the hill top was. I mean seriously... you could have froze water on that woman's hindparts... this is where I would like to point out, I don't recall signing anything when I came out of the womb that said "I will be friendly to any and all persons I come into contact with", therefore I reserve the right to chose who I am friendly to. On the top of that list you will not find people who can't be friendly to me. To those people... I don't have a very large tucus, but I'm sure I can find a spot large enough for you to fit your stuck up, obnoxious lips.
Back to my weekend, saturday I spent the day playing with Braxton which was awesome. Then headed to hatfield for Claude's surprise birthday/retirement party. He was completely shocked so it was a success. The food was good, the company was shady... but of course that's what you usually end up with when you associate with state livestock inspectors. There was much cussing and discussing. Lots of laughter, and many complaints on how full everyone's stomach got to be... especially after the homemade ice cream and various other desserts were busted out. Sunday I spent the whole day with my little man. He amazes me. His vocabulary has grown leaps and bounds... which could be a negative thing considering it now includes: "ah shit, damnit, retard, oh nuts, dick head, and DUH!". But he says some things that are positives, such as: "horse, cow, ostrich, flamingo, bite, tail, toes, eyes, pigs, pink, hay, watermelon, cantelope, ice cream, hot dogs, and choo choo". But I have to tell you, of all the things he says my heart melts to pieces when he says "shoes". Its just too adorable... but while that melts my heart, nothing could have made my weekend the way him saying "Emily" for the first time. I came very close to crying... ok, so I let a few tears slide. We've been working on it a long time. We were talking about the letters of the alphabet (he can say them all) and when I got to E he said "E, egg... Emily..." it was cute!
Later that day we visited our friends who had a baby last week, he was precious! And their other son is just too funny. then my grandpa grilled hot dogs and hamburgers. Monday morning my grandpa taught me to make his homemade biscuits because mine never turn out. My grandma and I managed to burn them as soon as he left the house. It was pretty funny. I really love my grandparents... they are truley the 2 best people I've ever had the pleasure of meeting. They mean so much to me, I can't imagine my world without them. My grandma has been diagnosed with CHF, so my world seems to be falling apart. Got to move on before I really lose it here. We finally made it back to waldo. Worked a really long day tuesday....
Today my summer 2 class started. Trig. Oh what fun. I sat down and survey the room. In the front sat an asian guy and his daughter I guessed. I thought cool, I wish I had a kid to bring to college with me. When the teacher walked in dad got up and left the room... leaving his daughter alone. It took me a few minutes to realize that this child, who was between 8 and 10 years old, was really a student in my college trig class. As soon as the teacher started talking I was embarrassed... she knew more of that crap than I did. So not cool. so I've developed a plan. There should be a special section of college classes for child progidies so they don't come to regular classes and make me feel retarded! Other than that I've realized I will probably fail this class. As of today I've lost 7lbs. Go me. I worked this afternoon which did nothing for my mood. I finished up the laundry. And fancy left a "4 claw" mark down the side of my face. And now I'm about to work on my trig homework. I think that about sums it up. That's about all I can remember for now. I did take pictures this weekend. I'll work on posting some.

this is my boring life....

E... Eggs... Emily

Thursday, July 1, 2010


Today while I was on hour 10 of work I was jamming out to some red dirt music on the ol ipod. Man I love technology. Probably one of my top 1o songs is 'If I ever get back to Oklahoma" by Jason Boland and the Stragglers (most of their songs are among my favorites). When it came on I found my heart longing, once again, for the place that should have been my place of birth... although I may not have appreciated it as much if it had been. Three years ago (ish) Chad and I set out to the national finals in the great Oklahoma City. My very first thought? "Damn team ropen. Damn it, damn it I hate team ropen". Then we hit the oklahoma line and instead of my jaw flapping it just sort of hanged there. Now, I had been to oklahoma before. That's where most of my family is from and that's where all our family reunions are held. Also, I am from polk county and the closest beer store is across the state line into oklahoma... not that I would ever drive to oklahoma just for beer, we usually "checked stock" along the way. But as we drove into the beautiful state that neighbors my home state I just couldn't take in enough of it. The further we drove the happier I felt... yes, I was on my way to a ropen and my heart felt light and the smile apon my face kept spreading. And this thought ran through my head... "I'm going to move here some day." It was an odd thought that I sort of just shook off to enjoy the scenery. When we arrived in midwest city, that's where we always stay, I was in one of the most cheerful of moods. I just felt like there were no burdens, I had no stressful issues at home, I didn't have mounds of homework stacking up from missing school, and Chad and I weren't fighting (I don't remember what about... I just remember that's how the trip started out). The air felt fresh, crisp and welcoming. Mind you, this is the last week of october. Yet I couldn't have been happier to have that fierce oklahoma wind threatening to rip my nose straight from my face. As the week went on we visited the local sights. That's where I began to fall in love. We went to bricktown and explored. We went in stores, we walked to canals, we just took it all in. And I couldn't get enough of it. THEN the final piece was placed into its spot, we went to the stockyards and ate at Cattleman's. Now take into account that I HATE salad (well, use to.) and DESPISE salad dressings. I ate 3 salads...with dressing before they brought my steak. I devoured 2 bowls of their salad dressing on their homemade croutons. When my steak came I couldn't resist... I drenched it and my baked potato in it. That day was the day I fell in love with salad. And I actually like some dressings now, but every time I think of oklahoma I get a several week long craving for the Cattleman's dressing. Aside from the salad dressing, I promise that's not why I love oklahoma, we were there for halloween. We went to see Saw 5(?) on its opening night. Bricktown on halloween is like a foreign planet. You can barely drive down the streets in a small car for all the bicycle carts, horse drawn carriages, and people dressed as goons and ferries. THAT was the moment my love affair with Oklahoma City began. We have gone back every year since then and every year I fall more in love, if that's possible. So yes... Jason Boland and the Stragglers said it right when they said "If I ever get back to oklahoma I'm gonna nail my feet to the ground". Oklahoma isn't my home state... but its the closest thing I can get to a "step" home state.

Don't get me wrong.... Arkansas is one of the most amazing states EVER. Its so beautiful here. The farm where I grew up is just breath taking. And I will never want to be permenately away from there, but I'd rather live in oklahoma and visit my mountains, creeks, hay meadows, and wildlife in arkansas.

At that I'll leave you with some images of my home in mena, ar.